congrats to me on receiving a truck-load of asshole today.
you know, people hate doing customer service because end-users are generally dumb. i lose patience with dumb but at least the majority of the dumb are nice people. clueless — but nice. i can deal with nice though it comes attached with extreme dumb, or even a dose of Stubborn.
but Dumb + Stubborn + Asshole REALLY pushes my limit. why the fuck do people feel compelled to go through life unloading unreasonably on everyone?! seriously. what the fuck is wrong with you that you can’t extend a little courtesy to well-meaning third-parties? i KNOW i’m not an unreasonable, poor customer service. customers call and email me back just to say thanks. customers will stay on hold forever because they only want to talk me. i am Awesome at my job because i don’t ever throw it in anyone’s face. so.
Hey You Bitch Lady and Your Son with the Terminal Brain Malfunction:
Incessant screaming at me only proves how classless and utterly deplorable a human being you are. You are all that exemplifies what is wrong with capitalist society. You are what makes all other ethnicities look down on us Chinese. My company’s service is not at fault because you were a rude bitch on the phone from the first time I ever heard your voice — so don’t start on how you’re mad only because we don’t service you right.
Your son is a fucking liar. You are paying a bajillion dollars for a Berkeley education that is amounting to nothing because all the CS and EE majors in the world will never learn your idiot child how to Google-research. Don’t tell me about how busy he is — it is now THE MIDDLE OF FEBRUARY and his ass is NOT at school. God knows what he’s actually studying if he can’t even figure out why an enterprise software relies on MS SQL instead of MySQL. Even I know the difference and I’m so not an expert in this stuff. The fact that I even have to explain where to find export functions in Peachtree to him speaks volumes of his lazy ineptitude. It’s not rocket science. Logging on today just to see him find out how to export WITHIN FIVE MINUTES was such a fucking waste of everyone’s time.
NO COMPANY IN THE WORLD ever hands you everything on a plate, irregardless of the initial sales pitch. Every company draws a line at where their collaboration ends, be it for cost or for the simple fact that what is requested is impossible to implement. I’ve worked with hundreds of customers who have the decency and courtesy to respect those boundaries. They may not always get what they want but they also don’t call 50 times a day screamming on the phone about poor service. Your refusal to give a little in the spirit of business cooperation is your daily proof to everyone who picks up your calls how inadequate a human being you are. Furthermore, just because you don’t agree with my boss is no reason to take it out on his employees. Being rude, unprofessional and accusatory to everyone will never win you any sympathizers in this group. We all just dislike you. A WHOLE FUCKING LOT.
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if you recognize yourself to be the addressee of above letter, rest assured that if i ever see you in person, i will kick you so hard in the crotch that your kidneys come out your eye holes. this is to save the rest of humanity from your reprobate asshole ever reproducing again and spreading your dirty genes all over the place.